A message for Solomon Grundie

Lately (Read six months or so), I’ve been trying to get ahold of one Solomon Grundie.

Since I work a lot, he works . . . sometimes… and I don’t have a phone number for him, it’s been rough.

So the other day, I saw him walking along. Basically, plodding. He was nodding to himself and listening to a musical device. I thought, “Hey a great time to get his attention”

So I headed over to tap him on the shoulder.

Diving across three lanes of traffic (did I mention I was in my car? I was in my car), I swerved toward him and yelled HAAAAAAY HAAAAAY HAAAAAAY DICKFACE while headed straight for him. From THE FRONT.

He just kept walking.

This motherfucker was SO oblivious, so INTO the pedestrian experience, he didn’t notice an SUV piloted by a pyschopath headed right for him.

So I thought, “Either he’s ducking me, or it’s really hard to get his attention. What’s less subtle?”

Hence this post.

If this doesn’t work, 2 live Crew is still together and will work, at a place I specify, for a reasonable amount of money.

Don’t make me rap you up, son.

7 thoughts on “A message for Solomon Grundie

  1. Haha, friggin’ sweet. I’m afraid i’m not really good enough to do that much either. Actually, that’s a lie, it just requires me to actually learn the basic of the song.

    You know, you may have something there. Harp version of “War Pigs”? How about “Highway to Hell”? Yeaaaaa buddy.

  2. The guy downstairs from me with the trumpet I keep trying to teach to play “Face Down Ass Up” because I told him it’ll impress his girlfriend.

  3. Mmmm. Kiwana horned melon Daquiri. I like the way you think. 😀

    Maybe he just had a really, really good song playing on his ipod that he didn’t want to miss. You just don’t think of these things, do you?

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