Well, I was supposed to do a bunch of stuff last night but instead I slept! I now have god knows how many voice and txt msgs sitting and people chewing my ass like smacked up pihranna for “ditching” them.

I’m pretty sick and I decided to take an afternoon nap before going out thursday night to do Things.

Thanks to being sick, having my phone on a carpeted floor on vibrate, and setting my alarm for 4:30 AM and not 4:30 PM, I slept for 14+ hours

I still feel sick.

In other news, I discovered that my default xanga subscription settings at some point got set to “hidden” and so new people I have subscribed to in the last few months haven’t been showing up in my update box.

So that’s where I’ve been.

Also, for those of you wondering:

That thing people have in their websites that tells you your OS and IP and stuff? That’s not anything mysterious or Orwellian. It’s data being pulled from your computer too your screen, and it’s all data the internet needs to send and recieve to your computer

Just in case you ever worried.

I cancled my hollywood video account today. I like to give them a few months a year to get ahead of me since I watch movies faster then they come out.

So it was just kind of a coincidence that one little monument was covered in sand.

They were talking on the news today about a guy who was an 80 year old billionaire.

What’s that like?

I mean, you work your whole life to build this thing, this money, and well, you grow to learn, to paraphrase William Gibson, the very rich are barely human at all. Your money is a self replicated, self managing meta-creature with agencies and impulses of its own. Your fortune is so large it cheerfully generates miraculous sums as a by-product of its twists and turns through the currents of finance. Your deeds have become this entity, this thing.

You can buy any item, humor any drive. You’ve done a great many things, had women, men if you want. You could be a paragon of virtue, or a pillar of smoking sleaze. If you wanted, you could craft a law and see it put in place, or stop one, you could easily have a man murdered, buy a private nation, control a real nation, learn to fly, hunt a man for sport, whatever. You have Total Freedom. You’re a success, a big noise. You have Got The Edge and you have Personal Power that Tony Robbins would choke on if it was dancing up and down his fucking spine.

But you’re 80, you’re dying right on schedule.

What’s that like?

One great big festering neon distraction,
I’ve a suggestion to keep you all occupied.

Learn to swim.

Mom’s gonna fix it all soon.
Mom’s comin’ round to put it back the way it ought to be.

Learn to swim.

Fuck L Ron Hubbard and
Fuck all his clones.
Fuck all those gun-toting
Hip gangster wannabes.

Learn to swim.

Fuck retro anything.
Fuck your tattoos.
Fuck all you junkies and
Fuck your short memory.

Learn to swim.

Fuck smiley glad-hands
With hidden agendas.
Fuck these dysfunctional,
Insecure actresses.

Learn to swim.

Cuz I’m praying for rain
And I’m praying for tidal waves
I wanna see the ground give way.
I wanna watch it all go down.
Mom please flush it all away.
I wanna watch it go right in and down.
I wanna watch it go right in.
Watch you flush it all away.

Time to bring it down again.
Don’t just call me pessimist.
Try and read between the lines.

I can’t imagine why you wouldn’t
Welcome any change, my friend.

I wanna see it all come down.
suck it down.
flush it down.

Celebrities are fucking dumb. I won’t even touch the fucking idea of the “celebrity activist” or the dumb tabloid shit.

Today I’m going to talk about their actual work ethic.

There is no reason for any celebrity to be a goddamn diva. Stop acting like idiots before people start to realize they could pay nice kids right out of acting school to be in their movies, and spend your millions on ads for the damn thing instead.

You know what I motherfucking hate?

When you try to pour something from a pitcher and it runs down the slope of the pitcher.

Sisters of mercy concert in denver thursday.

That means waffle house baby.

Here is what I want:

Nice girl.

Pretty.

Not full of shit

Not insane in any way

Must like the Pixies and not like nickleback or creed. It is acceptable if you have only heard of the pixies, as long as you really hate nickleback and creed.

High sex drive a plus.

That is literally my criteria, pretty much.

You would be supprised how often the nickelback item fucks up a good thing.

http://www.wyseguys.com/shittyroomate.asp

1. “Tween” – this is a bullshit word

2. “Podcasting” – These used to be called “long mp3s”

3. “Differently Abled” – Well yeah, I guess less is different

4. “Internet” used as a verb. Lookin’ at you, PeoplePC.

5. “Friendly Fire” – Yeah, that bullet just dropped by to borrow some fucking sugar

6. “Collateral Damage” – Whoops. Killed some people. Our bad. Shit. Sorry, other country

7. “Libary” – It’s got an r in the middle, too. Li-ber-ary A lie-berry would be a fruit that makes you lie.

8. “Bullying” – as an adult, if you were walking through the office and a co-worker reached out, knocked the monday morning meeting notes out of your hands, shoved you hard enough to knock you on your ass, and called you a fag, would it be “bullying” or fucking assault?

9. “Trips” Vs “a Set” – a SET is two in the pocket. TRIPS is two on the board. There’s a hell of a difference in hand strength. So write it down or something if you’re going to announce tv poker

10. A “hoard” is a big pile, ie hoard of treasure. “Horde” with an ‘e’ is a different word, meaning group, “Horde of assholes hoarding their hoard”