H.G.T.

This needs an explanation. A person who happens to be gay has been chatting with the Fleen and Rache crew… and he’s one of those, “Hi, I’m gay,” gay guys…so Fleener gets up to do some actual “work.”  And *I* slide into the seat for fun and frivoloty and the following chat ensued. “Fleener” is us here at Chuckufarley. The ‘innocent’ victim in all this is jeromycraig:

jeromycraig:
Fleener: Hi, howsit goin?
jeromycraig: Good.
Fleener: I’m not Fleener. He’s getting some stuff
Fleener: I’m his friend.
jeromycraig: Oh.  Thank God I showed restraint, then. 
Fleener: When I saw your name, I thought it was a sentance. I was like, “What’s a craig, and how do I jero it? Is that a sex act?”
jeromycraig: It can be. 
Fleener: You don’t need to show any restraint, I’m what’s known to the gypsies as “Ahhhhh, fuck, run, he’s killing Gypsies”
jeromycraig: Fleener asks me to be restrained when he’s not at the computer.  Fleener: Are you a Gypsy? Sorry if you are. . . I try to pick small groups for genocide cause they have fewer friends.
jeromycraig: Nope.
jeromycraig: Just your average gay homosexual.
Fleener: Hah! Too many of you guys for genocide, and you’re way to hard to pick out….sherpas are next on my list
Fleener: Fucking sherpas
Fleener: all barrell chested and able to breath at altitude.
jeromycraig: Plus, they smell like goats.
Fleener: they get all uppity about that, like I’m going to fight a sherpa in the mountain. Fuck that. They can come down to my level and their lungs can burst, know what I mean?
jeromycraig: lol
Fleener: Know who else needs to fucking catch two in the 4-head? Luxemborg.
Fleener: I didn’t spell that right, and I don’t give a crap
jeromycraig: Damned itty-bitty country! 
Fleener: cause I hate’em that much
Fleener: Dude, I *know,* I mean fuck. It’s like I declared my *room* a country
jeromycraig: Sorry.  I was sending a picture of my dick to someone.  You were saying?
Fleener: Too bad you can’t, like, cock-o-fax the real thing, but that would involve Jr. and a wringer, I guess…Fleener: Plus, what would you do if you had to whiz while they were using it?
jeromycraig: Way to wilt it, man. 
Fleener: yeah, if that didn’t wilt it I was gonna bring up scat.
jeromycraig:
Fleener: hey, do you know about Santorum?
jeromycraig: Nope.  Who or what is it?
Fleener: Well, Santorum is a senator. He and bill Frist are a coupla right wing dickweeds that want gay marriage forbidden, hate butt sex, never masturbate, can’t figure out why they are angry all the time, etc
Fleener: so
Fleener: this gay advice columnist decides to fuck with them
jeromycraig: How can they hate butt sex?!?! 
jeromycraig: How can anyone hate butt sex?!??!! 
Fleener: Well, they aren’t gay. They can harpoon the tuna instead, so it isn’t the only road to drive for them
Fleener: but I digress
jeromycraig: Which gay advice columnist?  Dan Savage?
Fleener: yes, the advice columnist decides he is going to do a reader survey, and that his readers will pick a pair of sex acts to name after the two congressmen
jeromycraig: LMAO
Fleener: so Fristing is anal fisting to wrist depth or greater
Fleener: while Santorum is the frothy mixture of feces and semen that trickles from the anus after anal intercourse.
Fleener: They make T-shirts
jeromycraig:
jeromycraig: Gross, but funny. 
Fleener: So what’s with bringing up your cock all the time – Let me guess, you own a small car, so you bring up your dick to over compensate?
jeromycraig: I’m a gay male.  We tend to think in terms of cocks.
Fleener: I bet you can’t even go into a Peppridge Farm without passing out with ‘the vapors’
jeromycraig: *clutching my pearls*
Fleener: I’m glad I’m not gay. If I was attracted to cocks they way I am nekkid wimmin, I’d never manage to dress. I’d become this pathetic masturbratory oroburos.
jeromycraig: lol
Fleener: That, and I could never be gay. It’s impossible to find trendy clothes my size
jeromycraig: I’m not trendy. 
Fleener: So you dress in dated gay fashion? Like John Waters? Thin mustaches, walking sticks?
Fleener: I kid, I kid
jeromycraig: I gotta go, man.  Tell Fleener bye for me.
Fleener: Later, gay homo guy. It was nice to meet you. jeromycraig: You too.
Fleener: Isn’t gay homo a double negative?